It was in that dreadful moment that I wasn't chosen & disregarded that I realized I had to literally begin to mourn the loss of my living father who metaphorically died that day as my dad.  I was horribly criticized by the flying monkeys of my narcissistic mother & ostracized from this family for apparently abandoning my "parents", even though it was them who let me go that day.  They remain toxically comfortable in their victim mentality, using the story of their own distorted truth to narrate the fucked up dynamics of their broken family.